Because Nothing Says "I Love You" Like...

A singing bulldog???

Not sure how many Walgreens customers are into S&M, but if you're into spiked collars and such, head on down to your local discount pharmacy now!

And for Your Valentine's Listening Pleasure

It's the animated singing, guitar-playing and "I Love You" Stuffed Animal Band!

Obviously, judging from his asking price, the Singing Monkey thinks he's the reason behind the band's success, followed by teeny-bopper idol, I Love You Puppy. The Guitar Player's too stoned to care.

Talk About a Mood Killer...

I'm sorry, but if my Valentine ever stripped down to something like this, it would be the end of any romantic notions or plans whatsoever. Real men should not wear boxers with huge candy hearts and expect to get any. We'll be too busy laughing... at you!

For the Lovebirds Out There...

Wonder how long the feathers stay on the pen, as opposed to on the carpet, in the keyboard, in the cat's mouth...

Tigger would love one of these for Valentine's Day!

It Just Wouldn't Be Valentine's Day Without

A "Precious Moments" figurine.

I'm not touching the name "Valentine Waterballs". Sounds like some form of post-holiday STD, or a new type of sex toy.