First it Was Snow Globes

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At first glance, I thought this was the Holy Family in a pineapple. Upon closer inspection, it appears to be Jesus, Mary and Joseph in a palm tree. What they're doing in a palm tree is beyond me. They're in Bethlehem, not Florida. What's with the shiny gold star dangling above them? It looks like something hanging off a rear-view mirror.

And, is it just me, or does Joseph look like Quasimodo's distant cousin?

And I Thought Blow-Mold Was Bad...

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It's the inflatable Nativity petting zoo!

Who came up with this bright idea??? Not only is it inflatable, it lights up, too!

I'm probably going to go to hell for this, but take a closer look at the picture. For starters, check out the size of Joseph's beard. It's bigger than the rest of his head! Now, look at the Baby Jesus. What is He wearing??? Cellophane??? Glad Wrap???

Also, why do they all look like they're dancing to "Hands Up"? Look at Mary, singing "Gimme your heart. Gimme, gimme your heart".

The sad part is that most of these inflatable lawn decorations eventually end up spontaneously deflating, and this will probably look more like an episode of "CSI: Bethlehem" than a Nativity before Christmas is over.

It's Not Quite Charlie Brown's Christmas Tree...

But it sure is close!

The 16 inch Tabletop Tree from "Dollar Deals". Comes in your choice of lopsided red, or crooked-top gold.

The box says to "Decorate with Lights, Ornaments and Tinsel". Why do you need tinsel on a metallic tabletop tree? Can you say overkill?

Free Rice - Play and Feed the Hungry

FreeRice is a sister site of the world poverty site, Poverty.com.

FreeRice has two goals:

- Provide English vocabulary to everyone for free.

- Help end world hunger by providing rice to hungry people for free.

For each word that you get right in this vocabulary game, they'll donate 20 grains of rice through the United Nations to help end world hunger.

What IS It???

I don't even know what this thing is, other than a really feeble attempt at Halloween humor. It was in with the Halloween mugs, but somehow, I doubt that anyone would want to drink out of this, unless they wanted to put an eye out in the process.

I Know It's a Bit Early for Christmas, But...

You know you really want one of these!!!

The "Veggie Tales" Nativity Set. A bunch of vegetables in a manger, gourds popping out of cows, three wise veggies and pea sheep - what more could you want? I don't know, but Baby Jesus as a vegetable, let alone a carrot just seems wrong on some level.

It even includes Laura Angel watching over everyone, and Junior Asparagus singing "Oh, Little Town of Bethlehem". I'll bet that sure gets annoying after a while!

Now I Really HAVE Seen Everything!

Answer Me Jesus - For those times when a plain, old Magic 8-Ball just won't cut it.

Personally, I'd love to hear what Jesus has to say about the person who decided he'd look great in hot pink.

Holy Praying Bunnies, Batman!

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It's Prayer Rabbit, safe from the dangers of the Briar Patch!!!

A lingerie-wearing Easter bunny, with an added bonus - she PRAYS!!!

Of course, I couldn't resist the summons to "Try Me!", which was boldly emblazoned in red on her left hand, like some kind of backwards stigmata. I wasn't quite prepared for what happened next. Oh, I expected her to pray, like it said on the box. But, what I wasn't expecting was for her cheeks to light up with two bright red lights, like some bizarre Easter version of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. "Rosie the Red-Cheeked Rabbit", maybe?

As for praying, no, she doesn't say anything like "Please God, get me out of this stupid outfit before I barf", which is what I would be saying if I were in her shoes. Oh wait, she's not wearing any. No, instead she launches into a long version of "Now I lay me down to sleep..."

No offense to the makers of this little gem, but wouldn't it make a bit more sense to dress her up in something a bit more, ummm... modest? Something which doesn't leave her entire nether regions exposed for all to see, like a born-again Victoria's Secret model?

Someone Please Explain This to Me...

Santa HatSale! Only 99¢

Why on earth would anyone want to buy a Santa Hat for their cell phone??? I've seen some pretty bizarre holiday items in my travels, but this one's a first for me!

It's the Easter Bunny, Charlie Brown!

Cross-dressing, inter-species style.

Barbie and the Easter Bunny play dress-up in each other's clothes.

For Someone Special...

 

From the folks at Family Dollar...

A box of Valentine chocolates. For when you care enough to spend a whole dollar.

Sometimes, You Just Have to Say...

 

WHAT THE ----???

A beaver with antlers wearing a Santa hat, holding a Christmas tree??? What is this??? Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Roadkill???

Frosty Plays Dress-Up

 

This is what happens when Frosty gets toasted on too much egg-nog. He puts on women's clothing and hangs around in bars.

A Kindred Spirit!!!

If you have a few minutes, please go and take a look at Thrift Shop Horrors. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one out there who posts this type of stuff!

Now the REAL Fun Begins!

Now is the time when all the decorations and other items that couldn't find a home for the holidays surface in "clearance" bins in stores all over!

Some of these, like the pipe cleaner snowmen above, are bound to spend several months in their new home, waiting for someone to buy them - real cheap.

Some will never find homes, and will end up as permanent "clearance" bin residents for eternity. That's when things get scary!